Today is the day I would be moving in to my dorm and unpacking my things ready to start a new chapter in my life. People would be giving me life advice and well wishes on my Facebook wall. My stomach would be flip-flopping and I'd be trying not to cry as I hugged my family good-bye. My friends from camp and I would be reuniting after years of not seeing each other.
But today isn't the day. Today is just another day. The only thing that makes this day different than yesterday is that my social media is blowing up with pictures and exclamations points and '#Classof2019' plastered everywhere.
Since I was little I had planned on going to college right away. To be honest, I never really wanted to. But I had a plan. Until I changed my mind. Until I turned down my ideal school three times for what seemed like no reason at all. I answered phone calls, explaining why I couldn't take money and would they please wait for a year for me to figure myself out a little bit.
So, no. I'm not joining my peers at college today. I won't be #Classof2019.
Today I'm working on homeschool blog posts for the upcoming 50's musical. I'm memorizing lines for a show where I get to yell in the devil's face and profess my love for a hell-bound farmer in front of a jury of dead people. I get to go to work and train one of my dear friends on how to serve up fudge and count up the till. I'm knitting up sweaters.
I won't be experiencing the same things that my friends will. I get to do different things. Crazy, weird things. And that's okay. I cannot wait to hear stories about school and college. I've loved this summer of spending time with people I won't be seeing this year. I've loved paying in cupfuls of change at WalMart, going on rollercoasters and not throwing up, getting my ears double pierced in front of passersby at the mall, catching shoplifters in the act, helping some awesome people write up puppet scripts for day camps this summer, and getting back into community theatre after a year off.
I have to continually remind myself that just because the things I'm experiencing and going through are different doesn't mean that they aren't just as important. Even though I won't be studying from a curriculum like my siblings (BTW, it's super weird not being a part of the school year in my house. Watching my siblings studying without having the feeling that I should be doing the same is something I wasn't ready for. I've resorted to curling up in my room to read and knit) I will still be learning this year. I have the opportunity to stretch myself outside my boundaries and figure out who I am outside of school.
I've gotten a good deal of confused - or even pitying - looks, but the incredible amount of support that I've received far outweighs any negativity. I'm thankful for the people that I'm surrounded with and I can't wait to spend this year with them.
